One of the charges often directed towards
the L.A. punk scene was that it was
somehow less valid than the N.Y. or U.K.
scenes because L.A. punks were
supposedly just bored suburbanites: kids
from middle class families who decided it
would be fun to jump on the punk
bandwagon. There was no reason for
punks in sunny Southern California to be
angry.
People therefore assume that Alice was
just "pretending to be angry" onstage.
She wasn't. Below, Alice writes about the
source of her onstage venom.
the L.A. punk scene was that it was
somehow less valid than the N.Y. or U.K.
scenes because L.A. punks were
supposedly just bored suburbanites: kids
from middle class families who decided it
would be fun to jump on the punk
bandwagon. There was no reason for
punks in sunny Southern California to be
angry.
People therefore assume that Alice was
just "pretending to be angry" onstage.
She wasn't. Below, Alice writes about the
source of her onstage venom.
"I grew up in East L.A., in a neighborhood
where people got shot on a regular basis. My
family was very poor and I was surrounded by
violence as a child. My father used to beat my
mother. When I was just a little kid, about six
or seven years old, I remember a particularly
harrowing experience when my father had
beaten my mother badly and he made her kneel
before him and apologize for whatever it was
she had done. He spat on her as she tried to
speak and then he commanded me to come over
and spit on her, too. I refused. I hated him so
much at that moment and that hate didn't leave
me until many years later. I was always able to
get in touch with it. I vowed never to be a
victim, even if it meant my own death.
"One time, when I was about 10 years old and
my family was visiting my aunt in Mexico City, I
heard my mother screaming and the sound of
my father hitting her. I was playing outside in
the neighbor's yard, which was up a steep
outdoor staircase from the house we were
staying in at the time. I just remember thinking
that there wasn't time for me to take the stairs.
I got a running start and jumped about 10 feet
through the air, landed on the concrete steps
and ran into the house to try and break it up.
My aunt was staring in disbelief that I hadn't
broken my ankles, which by all rights I should
have. I remember thinking that the intense
feelings of anger I was experiencing had given
me superhuman powers to do what I couldn't
have ordinarily done."
where people got shot on a regular basis. My
family was very poor and I was surrounded by
violence as a child. My father used to beat my
mother. When I was just a little kid, about six
or seven years old, I remember a particularly
harrowing experience when my father had
beaten my mother badly and he made her kneel
before him and apologize for whatever it was
she had done. He spat on her as she tried to
speak and then he commanded me to come over
and spit on her, too. I refused. I hated him so
much at that moment and that hate didn't leave
me until many years later. I was always able to
get in touch with it. I vowed never to be a
victim, even if it meant my own death.
"One time, when I was about 10 years old and
my family was visiting my aunt in Mexico City, I
heard my mother screaming and the sound of
my father hitting her. I was playing outside in
the neighbor's yard, which was up a steep
outdoor staircase from the house we were
staying in at the time. I just remember thinking
that there wasn't time for me to take the stairs.
I got a running start and jumped about 10 feet
through the air, landed on the concrete steps
and ran into the house to try and break it up.
My aunt was staring in disbelief that I hadn't
broken my ankles, which by all rights I should
have. I remember thinking that the intense
feelings of anger I was experiencing had given
me superhuman powers to do what I couldn't
have ordinarily done."
"When I entered junior high, I had pretty good
grades. One of the perks of this was that instead
of taking an extra class, you were allowed to
choose service. I got to be the hall monitor (what
a geek!), which is a really cruel thing to do to a
seventh grader. I remember walking into the
girls' bathroom at Stevenson Junior High (in East
L.A.) and seeing a group of cholas "jumping"
another girl into the gang. She was on the floor
and they were kicking her hard, really punching
the shit out of her. I meekly said, "Um, can you
please stop?" Of course, they paid no attention to
me and went on beating the girl. The weird thing
was that the girl got up, bloodied and smiling,
because she was now part of the gang. The
realization that someone could actually enjoy
being beaten was both revolting and thrilling to
me.
"This kind of violence was all around me as I
grew up, at home and at school. I hated violence;
detested it. But as much as I tried to avoid it, I
was internalizing it all the time. When I finally
found an outlet as lead singer of The Bags, all the
violence that I'd stuffed down inside of me for
years came screaming out. I would literally black
out while onstage with The Bags; it was like
"normal Alice" checked out and "violent Alice"
checked in. All the anger I felt towards people
who had treated me like an idiot as a young girl
because I was the daughter of Mexican parents
and spoke broken English, all the times I'd been
picked on by peers because I was overweight
and wore glasses, all the impotent rage that I
had towards my father for beating my mother
just exploded, and that's what people saw
onstage."
grades. One of the perks of this was that instead
of taking an extra class, you were allowed to
choose service. I got to be the hall monitor (what
a geek!), which is a really cruel thing to do to a
seventh grader. I remember walking into the
girls' bathroom at Stevenson Junior High (in East
L.A.) and seeing a group of cholas "jumping"
another girl into the gang. She was on the floor
and they were kicking her hard, really punching
the shit out of her. I meekly said, "Um, can you
please stop?" Of course, they paid no attention to
me and went on beating the girl. The weird thing
was that the girl got up, bloodied and smiling,
because she was now part of the gang. The
realization that someone could actually enjoy
being beaten was both revolting and thrilling to
me.
"This kind of violence was all around me as I
grew up, at home and at school. I hated violence;
detested it. But as much as I tried to avoid it, I
was internalizing it all the time. When I finally
found an outlet as lead singer of The Bags, all the
violence that I'd stuffed down inside of me for
years came screaming out. I would literally black
out while onstage with The Bags; it was like
"normal Alice" checked out and "violent Alice"
checked in. All the anger I felt towards people
who had treated me like an idiot as a young girl
because I was the daughter of Mexican parents
and spoke broken English, all the times I'd been
picked on by peers because I was overweight
and wore glasses, all the impotent rage that I
had towards my father for beating my mother
just exploded, and that's what people saw
onstage."
| Alice talks about growing up with domestic violence and the story behind her song Happy Accident. Click on the thumbnail for a video. |
